Hey ! Welcome to the October issue of Genius in Leadership and the 21 Immutable Laws of Persuasion. If you are just getting into this, go ahead and check out laws 1-4 when you get a chance.

This month, we are covering the fifth law of persuasion is responsibility. Now at first hearing may not seem to have anything to do with persuasion. However, in order for someone to be persuaded they have to be aware that they are responsible to change.

There are two ways to do this:

1. Strong arming and manipulation

This is basically breaking the other person down and persuading them out of their weakness and vulnerability. This is a quick fix solution which rarely leads to truly committed persuasion. Even when it does, the person who has been “persuaded” usually ends up resenting themselves for being weak, as well as the person who “made them” change their mind. Not to mention that this approach creates a strain in the relationship with is a horrible price to pay for persuading someone.

1. Empowering the person to change

This is when you demonstrate to the other person that they have the power and the desire to change and that they are therefore responsible to change. Responsibility of this sort is inspired by someone coming to the conclusion that they need to change. Once they realize that they need to change, you can empower them by believing in them and demonstrating that they are capable of changing. This is using responsibility to persuade, and it is the only way to truly persuade a person.

This is because by nature people resist change unless it’s THEIR idea. A person is much more easily convinced by conclusions which they arrive at on their own, as opposed to those which appear to be forced on them. Even when the change is for their own benefit, people resist being coerced by others to change. So how can you apply this law of persuasion?

• Questions are the answer

First, by the use of questions to draw out that person’s inner desires to change. For example, if you are persuading someone to buy a product what will help them manage their finances better:

“How long have you been living paycheck to paycheck? How important would it be for you to finally put an end to that?” Well guess what? You can! But if not today…..when?”

If these kinds of questions don’t awaken the desire to change, better to move on to someone who has the desire. Someone who refuses to admit that there is a need for change is never going to accept that they are responsible to change no matter how hard you try.  All that you are going to do is build up more resistance as they defend and reinforce their position.

However, people who have an inner desire to change simply need to have it awakened. Once they realize that these desires are theirs, they will take responsibility to change them because they are taking ownership. This is effective persuasion based on their desire which they will accept as their responsibility.

So that’s the 5^th law of persuasion…stay tuned for next month as we explore the 6^th law: integrity. To read about any of the previous laws, simply click on the law below.

1. Trance Breaking
2. Curiosity
3. Hope
4. Jealousy

Stay tuned, because at the end of The 21 Laws I’ll be offering a full version with examples of how to use all 21 laws and to create KILLER sales copy!

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